How to Develop and Boost your Self-Esteem

Do you think your self-esteem is low and don’t know what to do about it? Well… that’s definitely not a problem because self confidence is not something to inherit; it’s just like any other skill, you need to learn about it and work on it until you excel at it.

How you can develop a self confidence

1. Relax

Okay, before you want to do anything, you need to relax… just make yourself comfortable, try not to think about the things that are bothering you and holding you down. You need to be at ease and easy-going on yourself, there is no need for tension. Just relax…


2. Identify the causes

When a stressful situation or a negative thought occurs, an action of self-defeating follows. So, What you need to do is identify the kind of situations or thoughts that make you feel bad and inferior, and then teach yourself how to act and what to do about it.

Is it the way you look? Is it public communications? Is it someone in the family? Identify the exact source of the problem so you can find a convenient solution.

3. Be positive

Instead of focusing on the problem itself, focus rather on what goes well for you.  In other words, focus on the positive things in your life, even if they were too small to notice. It will keep you from complaining and dwelling on the negative things in your life.

4. Set small goals

Before proving it to people, you need to prove to yourself that you are good at something. Set small goals where you can challenge yourself. Do whatever you can to reach that goal you set, and try again if you fail, but trust me… once you make it, you will become confident and steady.

5. Be social in terms of activities

Contributing to social activities is one of the most important things you can do. It doesn’t have to be a big mission, just offer your help to others when it’s possible.

Maybe you could volunteer in an association, or help your neighbors with gardening, or teach a kid something useful. Those kinds of activities will make you feel like you made a difference which means you’ve accomplished something. It will help you restore or build a positive image on yourself

6. Stop trying to be perfect

The common problem with people with low self-confidence is that whether they’re not trying to make a progress at all or they’re trying too hard! If you want to be a better version of yourself, then that doesn’t mean you’re supposed to be perfect and completely flawless, because you’d be chasing an illusion.

There is no such thing as perfection, and no matter what you do, you will always find something missing; keep in mind that perfection is something relative and that people’s’ perspectives on life differ. You are not here to be perfect; you are here to be you…

7. Dare to be you

I know you’ve heard this like a million times, but you’re going to have to hear it again and again. Just close your eyes for a minute and give it a deep thought…

No matter how many weaknesses you have, no matter how big your flaws are, you have to face reality, this is who you are, don’t just hide from it. This will help you recognize yourself more and realize what you can change about it.

8. Stay active

Now, this doesn’t sound like a funny idea, especially if you were lazy or too busy to exercise, but the fact is, exercises have a tremendous impact on your moral state.


So even if you were not a “workout” person, you can still have a walk from time to time, it will help you direct your executive functioning to more internal and important matters, which means you can work through problems, come up with ideas, ruminate, and discover solutions.

9. Don’t underestimate yourself

Just because you’re a small lion, doesn’t mean you can’t roar… Don’t underestimate yourself no matter what you’re feeling. If you convince yourself that you’re not good at anything, then no one will ever think you are; you will only get left behind.

On the opposite side, if you believe in your thoughts and ideas, you will earn people’s respect as well as your own self-respect.

10. Stop comparing yourself to others

We all envied someone at some point in our lives, we all thought that someone is better than us, maybe smarter, but that’s just not true. Nobody’s perfect… Sometimes comparisons are unfair because you don’t really know how it feels like to be someone else, don’t let the appearances mislead you.

The only person you should be competing against is yourself. If you want to be better; then you need to be better than the current version of yourself.

11. Don’t be afraid

In each one of us there is a hero waiting for a chance to come out, so don’t be afraid to let it out. Our fears exist only in our minds, so unchain your mind from those delusional fears; nothing in the world should ever intimidate that hero inside of you.

12. Try new things and find what you excel at

Don’t hesitate to try new things you’re not used too… It seems uncomfortable at first, but once you engage yourself in new sorts of things, you may get the chance to explore yourself and find what you’re good at —maybe you’re the next top chef, who knows!— Trust me on this one, it is really worth a shot, just give yourself a chance.

13. Learn from your mistakes

One of the things you need to do is learning from your mistakes, if you’ve ever done something wrong, it’s fine, we all make mistakes, but don’t you ever do that same mistake twice because your time is precious. But, Think about it though; think about the reasons and consequences of that mistake so you can learn why it is a mistake

14. Be realistic in your expectations

If you’ve decided to change something about yourself, then best of luck. However, do not set high expectations. In other words, be rational about your goals so you won’t get disappointed afterward, because that will only haunt you down and everything you ever did will get wasted.

15. Edit your thoughts

Sometimes the thoughts we have are just inequitable. The meaning is, those thoughts may not be the right landmark or basis to judge yourself on.

To be someone with a different race, religion or gender is never a reason to feel inferior; it’s just who you are and nobody can blame you for it. Sometimes we should change the way we think instead of changing ourselves

16. Have fun

Just have fun… Do the things you love, spend some time with your friends and family, make a laugh and just stop worrying about everything else. You will feel good about yourself.


17. Allow space for compliments

Don’t shut people out. Fencing yourself inside a box kills the confidence you’ve got left, so when you accomplish something or contribute to some activity, allow people to give you credit for it, don’t escape the situation.

18. Take good care of yourself

Take care of yourself; it is as simple as that. Give yourself a nice haircut, or a nice massage from time to time, just do whatever seems pleasing to you. Taking care of yourself helps you embrace yourself and that’s just indispensable to self-esteem boost.

19. Develop your skills

If you have any sort of skill, make sure to develop that skill and take it to the next level. That way, you’ll excel at it —and that my friend will lead you to greatness.

20. Express your feelings

If you have a close friend or a member of the family you feel comfortable talking to, then don’t be afraid to open up. A conversation with someone we love always helps…

21. Be receptive

Being receptive means you should pay more attention to what’s happening around you instead of focusing on yourself all the time. Thinking about yourself all that time will only make the problem worse, so be a little more receptive to end that self-absorption and give space to other things.

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